Goodness of fit is extremely important to me in all areas of my life. In most realms, I am extremely lucky. Jack and I fit together amazingly well and I can't imagine anyone who would make a better life partner for me. I am also beyond thrilled that fate saw fit to match us with the adorable princess we get to parent. I'm sure I would love any child I had, but Petal belonging to Jack and me and Jack and me belonging to her just seems to fit perfectly.
One area where I did not choose as well is my career. School psychology is a great career for many people and has many qualities to recommend it. Unfortunately, I am not suited for it - it always felt like a struggle to make myself conform to the job or the job to conform to me. I compare it to a starter marriage - I committed very early on at a young age where there was still a lot I didn't know about the world. The timing of Petal's birth afforded me the chance to make a clean break and I did so without (much) looking back.
But deciding to sever ties with one professional identity is only half the equation. There is still the question of what will come next. For the past few months, I have toyed with the idea of becoming certified to teach special education. I really enjoyed working in the school environment and I already know a lot about the special ed process, etc.
However, I have spent the past hour or so editing one of Jack's term papers and trying to explain proper comma usage. I find myself quickly getting frustrated with him and tongue tied in my explanations. Uh oh. If I want to pull my hair out when trying to explain something to my intelligent, highly motivated graduate student husband, how will I ever have the patience to try to teach learning disabled, most likely sullen teenagers? Looks like it's back to the drawing board. I know I want to stay working in the education field in some capacity, but what?
